We Re-Wrote Famous Sex Scenes From Movies To Be More Realistic

As Noah and Allie start to undress in the old house, Allie would get tangled up in her bra while tripping over her discarded dress. Noah is so focused on seeing Allie’s glorious breasts for the first time that his leg gets caught in his pants and he falls sideways into the piano. Once they are undressed, Allie would be like, “Noah, you’re super attractive and everything but I’m just not ~there~ yet,” because we know that you can’t just lubricate yourself at the drop of your pants. Noah and Allie would then participate in what we, in 2018, like to refer to as “foreplay.” Once they make their way to the floor, Allie would grab Noah’s discarded boxers to use as a pillow because hardwood floors are hard as fuck and she would wanna focus more on the D and less on the fact that her skull might crack open with the next thrust. Also, when Allie kept nervously talking, Noah would be like, “It’s fine babe, we don’t have to do anything, I respect you and your body.”