In this post series, I’ve been revisiting the movies I was obsessed with as a pre-teen and teen. Since it’s ~spooky~ season, I decided to check out Hocus Pocus, which came out when I was pretty young. Like many ’90s kids, I rewatched it every year growing up, but it’s been awhile since I’ve seen it. Here’s how the experience of revisiting it went down…
1. Whoa I had no idea Kenny Ortega directed this!
2. Eek this beginning part has always terrified me.
3. The “Come Little Children” song is truly haunting. And I think I was probably Emily’s age when I first watched this? It super freaked me out.
4. I had such a crush on Thackery Binx though. It is WILD that he grew up to be McGee on NCIS.
5. It’s so intense that a Disney movie opens with the actual murder of a kid.
6. Not gonna lie, even now the way the witches are sucking up Emily’s life force is making me STRESSED.
7. Okay kid murder aside, Bette Midler, Kathy Najimy and Sarah Jessica Parker seem to be having the best time in this movie and it’s absolutely delightful.
8. This Sanderson curse is low-key a bop.
9. Between Thackery Binx and Salem in Sabrina the Teenage Witch, talking black cats had a real moment in the ‘90s.
10. “Cat’s got my tongue.” Great pun lmao.
11. The flying book is so creepy.
12. So we’re 12 minutes in and one child has been murdered, one has been turned into a cat, and three women have been hanged. Wowza.
13. This movie is where I got 95% of my knowledge of Halloween. Especially because it’s really not a thing in Australia.
14. Max’s floppy hair and tie-dyed shirt is so incredibly ‘90s.
15. Max just gave Allison his number right in the middle of class? What a move.
16. Hahahahah and Allison just handed it right back to him. I love her.
17. The way they make you think something creepy is hiding in Max’s closet is SO SCARY.
18. Max is such a dork about to hump his pillow right now.
19. Thora Birch! I loved her so much growing up. She’s great as Dani.
20. Max’s room with the stairs and the drums and everything is so damn cool. Quit being a whiny little baby, Max.
21. Max’s costume is a “rap singer”? Okay.
22. Dani has guts sticking up to these bullies. She’s the best.
23. “Collect your candy and get out of my life.” Way harsh, Max.
24. I don’t really know trick-or-treating etiquette, but surely you don’t just walk into someone’s house, even if the door is ajar?
25. I remember being obsessed with Allison’s dress.
26. “Max likes your yabos.” Loooooool.
27. “Take her to the movies like a normal person.” Dani gives good advice.
28. “It’s just a bunch of hocus pocus.” He said it! He said the name of the movie!
29. Oh wow I forgot shit gets real the second Max lights the candle.
30. I don’t think I got the whole “virgin” thing the first time I watched this.
31. They’re ba-ack.
32. Dani immediately thinking to pretend to be a witch is brilliant. She has way more chill at 8 than I would have as an adult in this situation.
33. I love the way Max jumping in to defend Dani echoes the beginning of the movie with Thackery Binx and Emily.
34. Yaaass Allison to the rescue!
35. And Dani too!
36. Hahaha Max tricking the witches with the “burning rain of death” is great.
37. Why is Max more scared of a talking cat than three witches who have come back to life though?
38. Lol @ the sisters being freaked out by everything in the modern world.
39. I mean, same tbh.
40. Why does Thackery thinks Emily’s death is his fault though?
41. Billy’s resigned sigh when he sees his headstone is such a mood.
42. Winifred screaming “I am calm” just made me realise I am actually Winifred.
43. “We desire children.” “Hey it might take me a couple of tries…” Omg I never got that before now.
44. Okay I know he comes back to life, but the shot of the flattened kitty is HORRIFYING.
45. How was I not more traumatised by this movie as a kid?
46. I am cackling at the witches screaming when the little girl dressed as an angel said “bless you”.
47. I forgot Garry Marshall was “the devil” in this! And Penny Marshall is his wife, lol.
48. “Are you a virgin? Really?” This is very inappropriate question from a cop.
49. Ohhh he’s not a really cop.
50. Omg Billy’s fingers getting chopped off! Yikes.
51. “Amok amok amok!” Most iconic line of the whole movie.
52. Winifred’s unimpressed expression at this band’s terrible music is incredible.
53. Yesss I love this “I Put A Spell On You” scene.
54. “Hello Salem. My name’s Winifred! What’s yours?” Amazing.
55. Nice try with the attempted kiln murder. Shame it didn’t work.
56. The kids celebrating is such a warm fuzzy moment, especially the way they adopt Thackery Binx. I’m emosh.
57. “You wanna look in windows and watch babes undress?” Oh so these bullies are also sex pests.
58. “Remember, remember, remember Winnie remember…” I need sisters to chant this at me when I forget important things approximately 42 times a day.
59. I thought Mary flying on a vacuum was HILARIOUS when I was a kid. And also now as an adult.
60. The CGI making Thackery Binx talk has held up pretty well.
61. Oooft the fingernail cutting through the fly screen scared me so much as a kid. And also now as an adult.
62. The book shooting a green fireball at Max is a bit goofy.
63. Oh no not “Come Little Children” again.
64. Hahaha I love that daylight savings time plays a key part in this movie.
65. Max stealing his shoes back and leaving the bullies to rot is such a power move.
66. Okay but why didn’t the sisters just use the small amount of potion they have on one of the random kids who walked in so they don’t, you know, die, and THEN get revenge on Max and Dani?
67. That “resisting arrest” line doesn’t make sense coming out of Winifred’s mouth considering she didn’t even know what a bus was an hour ago.
68. Billy turning on Winifred is such a good twist.
69. “No no no, he’s a GOOD zombie.” Lol.
70. I love Billy.
71. “Go to hell!” “Oh, I’ve been there, thank you. I found it quite lovely.” Amazing.
72. Dani don’t get out of the salt circle!
73. “This’ll teach you to call people ugly.” Winifred is such a petty witch.
74. Why didn’t Max just pour the potion out instead of drinking it?
75. Bye-bye Sanderson sisters.
76. Thackery noooooo. His little “mrow” just killed me.
77. Between Thackery Binx and Casper, cute boy ghosts had a real moment in the ‘90s.
78. “I shall always be with you” is totally up there with “Can I keep you?”.
79. Why am I crying right now?
80. I’m surprised those parents have enough energy to even walk.
81. The book opening its eye is such a creepy last shot.
82. What a great movie.