Can You Finish These Classic Ron Swanson Quotes?

    1. “Half an ass is never enough.”

    2. “Whole-ass one thing.”

    3. “Multi-tasking is for the mentally deranged.”

    1. Ron: “Since I am not a rabbit, no I do not.”

    2. Ron: “Chris, I never knew you had such a zany sense of humor.”

    3. Ron: “I don’t even want to hear that word. It’s too vulgar for the dinner table.”

    1. “…teenage girls with daddy issues.”

    2. “…old ladies with insufferable grandchildren.”

    3. “…rich women on diets.”

    1. “…Vegetarians.”

    2. “…Skim milk.”

    3. “…Being honest about feelings.”

    1. …You are not ice cream, and I will hate you forever for that.”

    2. “…How dare you?”

    3. “…You are the celery of desserts.”

    1. “…but not ridiculous.”

    2. “…without the stupid pants and the dirty hippies.”

    3. “…except I still get to kill something.”

    1. “…is a cat, and cats are pointless.”

    2. “…is a joke, not a pet.”

    3. “…is just kidding itself.”

    1. “…before I put my fist in it.”

    2. “…to block the words from coming out.”

    3. “…and eat some meat. You are a man.”

  1. “On my deathbed, my final wish is to have my ex-wives rushed to my side…”

    NBC via Netflix

    1. “…so that I can be glad to leave this world behind.”

    2. “…so the police will not have to search far and wide for my murderer.”

    3. “…so I can use my dying breath to tell them both to go to hell one last time.”

    1. “America. Honor. Meat. Liberty. Breakfast.”

    2. “Bacon. Eggs. Whiskey. Steak. Farts.”

    3. “Rectangle. America. Megaphone. Monday. Butthole.”

  2. “I have cried twice in my life. Once, when I was seven and I was hit by a school bus…”

    NBC via Netflix

    1. “…and today, when I was recognized as a dedicated government employee. I am so ashamed.”

    2. “…and once again, when JJ’s Diner ran out of bacon. But today just might bring about time number three.”

    3. “…and then again when I heard that Lil’ Sebastian had passed.”

  3. “I’ve seen three movies in my life. Bridge on the River Kwai, Patton…”

    NBC via Netflix

    1. “…and Herbie Fully Loaded.”

    2. “…and Old Yeller.”

    3. “…and Breakfast at Tiffany’s, which was not what I expected it to be.”

Can You Finish These Classic Ron Swanson Quotes?

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